"Be still and know that I am God."

In fifty-four minutes, I will be attending my last final of the semester. The last final of the school year. All my work is done and I've been cleaning out notebooks and boxes and baskets of schoolwork, packing up books to move to a new house, adding papers to my already-full recycling bin. And I've been listening to a talk on Time given by Matthew Sleeth (author of "Serve God, Save the Planet") and thinking about my life and "Stop Days."

Stop Day. I'm not sure I know how to do those anymore. I used to say (and still think about) how taking a day off from your life is more than anything an act of trust. It is this matter of stopping and remembering who is God, who is in charge, and whose hands form the earth upon which my feet walk. Stop days.

The semester is over, I am anticipating moving and paying rent at a new place. I'm thinking about jobs and paychecks-- my last day working at the Elementary School was yesterday and everything is new again. I've had a few job interviews, one job offer. I'm tired but I don't have time to acknowledge it. This absence of energy has become a part of me. Only at the end of the day do I remember or notice my tired legs, my closing eyes.

Taking some time off as a matter of trust. I don't know what tomorrow holds or where my money will come from after today. It is strange to wake up these mornings this week and wonder what my to-do list will look like. It feels awkward having this empty space of time. But I need it. I need to stop and listen and live.

As I was cleaning a few things out this morning, I came across my old camera, the one that randomly stopped working about a year ago. I pulled it out, dusted it off, put in some batteries and turned the dial away from "off." The green light came up, the display lit up and I snapped a picture. It's back, if only momentarily. Something about this small miracle comes as a reminder of days when I had more time. How sometimes something as small as a carmera would remind me to stop, taking my life in and hold it still for a minute. If only for a minute.